How To Win An Argument With A Narcissist
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People keep asking me about how to deal with narcissists.
It's like a sore tooth. It hurts. You know you shouldn't mess with it, but something keeps drawing you right back to it.
If you've been here for awhile you know my advice for dealing with narcissists, don't!
They're not worth it. They will constantly put you in situations where you can't win called double binds.
They need you to be wrong so that they can be right.
The result is they keep taking advantage of you and you feel like crap.
But what if you have to deal with a narcissist and you can't avoid them? What if your boss or your neighbor is a narcissist?
Is it possible to win an argument with them?
Actually, yes.
Actually... It depends on what you call winning.
As I describe in this video,
if you're fantasizing that one day you're going to say all of the right things at all of the right times to the point that your neighborhood narcissist will fall to their knees and declare you the winner, let that go right now.
That's just not going to happen.
So how do you win?
Realistically what would winning an argument with the narcissist you have to deal with look and sound like?
1. Create a vision of what winning would be like.
2. Expect that they will presuppose that you're wrong and that they're superior for having to tolerate your wrongness.
3. Understand that a narcissist actually has a very weak sense of self that causes them to constantly seek outside validation.
Find ways to leverage this. Flattering them works extraordinarily well.
4. Don't fight directly with them and don't act defensively.
This is exactly what they want. Don't play their game.
5. Go meta and call out their need to make you wrong in order to validate themselves.
6. Optional and a bit risky, go on the offensive and reveal sensitive information about them.
To go more in depth with these points, check out the video.
Damon Cart
Life Mastery Teacher & Coach
Santa Cruz, California
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Damon Cart
Author
Damon Cart is considered to be a natural talent by some of the best NLP trainers in the world. His approach to guiding and teaching students brings to their awareness that they've been doing NLP all of their lives without realizing it and he empowers them with skills and resources to thrive and reach their full potential. With the understanding of how Neuro Linguistic Programs create one’s experience a person can then take charge of those programs and create the experience and the life they want. By taking this approach into his own rigorous, daily NLP practice Damon has been able to rapidly accelerate his progress in learning, coaching clients and teaching workshops.
