I'm going to let you in on a secret I don't normally talk about.

About five years ago I went through some major life changes. NLP was the tool I used to finally wake up to the reality that my marriage was over, among other areas of my life that weren't working.

Suddenly I found myself back in the dating game again and I didn't like it. There was this tremendous void now that I was suddenly single so I did what most people do, I immediately got into a rebound relationship.

Of course it didn't work out. They rarely do.

When it ended I was single again and realizing I had no idea what I was looking for in a woman or in a relationship.

It dawned on me that I should date a lot in order to figure it out. I decided not to get into a relationship for at least a year until I understood better what I wanted.

There was one big problem though. How was I going to make this dating thing happen?

I own my businesses so I have no coworkers to date. I'm not going to date my employees and I'm not going to date my clients.

What do I do?

I tried online dating, but didn't get very far. More on that later.

Most of my friends are married and have kids and their friends are mostly married and have kids so I couldn't depend on them to matchmake for me.

I don't like loud clubs so going out and getting liquored up so I could work up the courage to ask a woman to dance didn't appeal to me especially since I'm a terrible dancer.

There was really only one way to change my situation and it scared the hell out of me.

I live in Santa Cruz, CA where there's no shortage of attractive women. I would see them in the grocery store, downtown, on the beach, in coffeeshops; they're all over the place and yet I wasn't doing anything about it.

It was like an invisible barrier kept me from meeting them. Imagine you're thirsty and you're surrounded by water and you're not allowed to drink it.

Why?

I was just too scared to simply approach a woman I found attractive and interesting, introduce myself, make my intent clear and ask them out.

I had what is often referred to as approach anxiety and quite honestly most people suffer from it.

Men and women, how many times have you let an opportunity pass because you were too afraid to put yourself out there?

Too many to count if you ask me.

I would later learn that I wasn't alone.

This is a source of a lot of pain for men when it comes to dating.

Even the thought of approaching a beautiful woman in a grocery store, walking down the street, or in a park can make a man shake, sweat, and feel like he's going to hurl as he relives every heartbreak, rejection, and humiliation he's ever endured stretching back to grade school.

I don't mean to say that dating is easy for women either. It's not, but their problems are different than men's. Being a man I'm well aware of how men suffer in this area.

What happened from this point on turned into a challenge that became much bigger than just dating more women. It turned into a quest, a journey to understand this crippling fear and to learn how to overcome it.

And now I'm ready to teach it.

For years I've purposefully not touched this subject because I didn't want to be put in the same category as the people who teach seduction. These people often get blacklisted and aren't taken serious in the field of NLP.

But I'm sitting on a mountain of knowledge that can help so many men, which is the result of applying NLP to a part of my life where I was really unsatisfied and I wasn't enjoying the choice, freedom, and abundance I wanted.

If you're a man and you're single, you know what I mean. The fear of approaching women you find attractive is not only limiting your options in dating, it's limiting you in other areas of your life and it's causing you to settle too easily. 

Eventually, applying every NLP technique in my toolkit, I pushed through the fear and started approaching.

It was exhilarating at first as I broke through this invisible social barrier. What was even better is that most women were very receptive to my approach. They often appreciated my courage and thanked me for the compliment.

The first several approaches I made I was so nervous I would forget to ask her out or ask her for her phone number, which probably left her wondering why the hell had I approached her to begin with.

Eventually I got better at it and I started getting lots of numbers, which turned into lots of dates, and it almost became a full time job keeping up with it all.

My social life exploded. It even got to the point where if a date flaked on me I had two or three other women I could call and go on a date with instead.

An interesting thing started to happen that I did not expect. Even after hundreds of approaches, the fear of approaching wasn't going away.

In fact, the more I approached, the more I fed that fear. The stronger the fear got, the more I approached in an attempt to beat the fear.

It was a losing game. 

"But wait!" You might be thinking, "You had more dates than you had time for. Problem solved right?"

Wrong.

Solving my dating issue, or the lack of dates, was just a small problem on the surface.

The real problem was the fear inside me that I had yet to resolve.

Eventually the fear won. It beat me into exhaustion. I felt empty and I lacked the energy to keep approaching.

All of the dates, the abundance, the choice... All of it disappeared rapidly.

I was back to being alone and dateless. Over the next year I focused on work and tried to forget about it. 

At times I would think of getting out there again and then the fear would remind me of the exhaustion that would follow if I wanted a rematch.

After about a year of focusing on work and unintentionally isolating myself socially, I decided that it was time to start dating again.

I didn't care if the fear would win in the end. I wanted the social interaction. I really like women and I wanted to start meeting them again and socializing more.

I had just completed a big project, an online training that took more time and more work than I had expected. I was ready to take a break and have some fun.

Every time I saw an attractive woman I would urge myself to approach but the imaginary border would pop up and I couldn't do it.

I knew that eventually I would push through the fear like I had done before. It would be painful and exhausting but I had done it before and I could do it again.

Once again, something strange and unexpected happened. I suddenly understood the fear, what was causing it, and how I was making it worse by resisting it.

As soon as this happened, the boundary fell away. At that very moment a beautiful woman passed me on the street. The barrier came right back up as I thought about approaching her. I paused for a moment and applied the new insight I had to the fear and the boundary fell away again.

I approached her and I went on to do several more approaches that week with no fear. It was gone.

It was a transformation.

So what has happened since you might be wondering?

I'm still dating the first woman I approached when the barrier finally fell away for the last time.

There's a presupposition in NLP that choice is better than no choice and that people always make the best choice among the choices that are available to them.

Fewer choices mean fewer good choices. More choice means you're more likely to make a good one.

Now I don't mean to put a value on women or objectify them in any way by rating them as a good choice or a bad choice. Some couples are a good fit and some are not.

Too many people are willing to settle with partners they're not a good fit with because they fear being alone, but relationships based on fear don't usually work well.

When a man cannot approach a woman he finds attractive, his fears are in control and he's not functioning from a place of being whole and grounded.

I realized this was limiting me. I realized that I was missing opportunity after opportunity to meet the women I was interested in who could possibly make a great partner or even just a good friend.

Being a NLPer I knew that there had to be some sort of unconscious structure to this fear. How could something as innocent as approaching a woman, giving her a compliment, and introducing myself cripple me like I was in some sort of life or death situation?

Because when we get hurt emotionally we create boundaries.

The intent behind these boundaries is positive. Your unconscious is trying to protect you from getting hurt again.

The problem is these boundaries can severely limit your potential and not just when it comes to dating and relationships. 

The boundaries you create around yourself, in your personal space, and also the internal boundaries you create within yourself are unconscious. Because they're unconscious you have no choice about when they're appropriate and when they're not.

Not only do these boundaries limit your potential, they also prevent you from building rapport quickly and connecting with people.

Some of you understand exactly what I'm talking about here. Some of you feel that pain and the suffering that follows as you've been reading this email. Well there's help!

I will create a program for you that will show you how to overcome your fear and approach any woman no matter how stunning she is, in any situation- even if she's with a group of friends- and connect with her.

This doesn't just work for men meeting women.

I always encourage women to approach the men they're attracted to, but most women can't, not only because it scares them, but also because years of societal conditioning tells her she's not supposed to and that it will make her seem desperate. 

But that's just nonsense and yes this program will show you how to overcome this too.

Even though this online program will be taught from a man's perspective (mine) about how to overcome paralyzing approach anxiety and meet and connect with any woman, anyone can use the techniques I teach in this program to meet anyone, to rapidly create rapport with clients in sales or with your clients if you're a coach. 

Maybe you just want to make more friends, be more social, or network more. This program will help you with all of those.

It will also help you with overcoming your fears of public speaking and how to gain rapport with groups of people.

Imagine having a rich and active social life and going on dates with the type of women you've always wanted to date.

You might be thinking this is a young man's game or that it's easier to just do online dating.

I disagree.

I'm 40 years old and I date women of all ages. Using what I know I can date as much as I want provided I put the time and effort into it. For awhile I was going out on three dates a week with three different women. It was fun and time consuming.

You will be able to decide how much you want to date and make it happen and it doesn't matter how old you are, whether or not you're divorced, or if you have kids.

Online dating is a bit deceptive. Sure you don't have to walk through the fire of approaching a woman you don't know and risk being rejected, but for men, the odds are against you.

Online dating apps usually comprise 30% women and 70% men so unless you're a male model and a total stud and you're pictures were done by a professional photographer you won't get far.

Only the top 10% of the most attractive men online are going to date the women they want to date because let's face it, online dating is primarily about looks. A woman can't swipe right because you have a great personality.

Unless you can meet her in person she will never know the value you have to offer her.

What I will show you breaks through the typical social matrix and puts you in the lead. I will show you how to overcome shame, own your desires, and be bold enough to resolve your fear and meet and connect with the women you're attracted to.

Imagine being able to approach any woman, anywhere, any time and connect with her and date her. Imagine never letting fear ever get in the way again.

When you overcome this fear you will move mountains. Your new confidence will spread to all areas of your life.

I know so many people who have gone to Tony Robbins's events and have walked on fire in order to gain greater confidence and destroy limiting beliefs and yet not one of them could muster the courage to approach a beautiful woman in public.

I've known super successful men- men who could sell anything to anyone and who could command a room full of high powered executives- turn to mush at the site of a woman they wanted to meet.

This doesn't have to be you any longer.

Dating as much as you want to and supercharging your social life will just be the bonuses that you will get when you take this training.

When you finally resolve this fear you will awaken to a truer sense of self and you'll never go back to letting fear limit you from putting yourself out there.

Speaking of bonuses I'm going to add a few to this training:

Bonus #1 "What do I say once I approach her?"

I hear this so often from men and I used to worry about the same thing. Unfortunately a lot of men turn to lines and scripts, which prevents them from really connecting with women and they often don't work. I'll teach you how to be authentically interesting in this bonus so knowing what to say will come natural.

Bonus #2 Healing Painful Memories

A lot of men have endured humiliating experiences when it comes to women and dating and this often prevents them from connecting with women. I'll show you how to heal this memories and actually use them to help you connect better with women.

Bonus #3 Confidence Under Pressure

So you've made the approach. You know what to say, but you're nervous and shaking, what do you do? In this bonus I will show you simple techniques that will keep you cool and calm under pressure. And of course you can use these techniques in any situation, not just approaching.

Bonus #4 How To Know When She's Approaching You

Women do approach men but unfortunately most men aren't even aware of it. Like I mentioned before I encourage women to approach the men they want, to choose who they want to date rather than wait to be chosen. But most women tend to be very subtle. If you're not aware of the signs women put out there to show they're interested in you, you're missing wonderful opportunities. I'll teach you what to look for so that you'll know when she's interested in you. 

If you want to preorder this course at a discounted price, I will open the doors for one week starting today and ending on August 1st. You can still purchase it later but the price will go up to the market price.

Right now you can get the training for just $97 by clicking here.

Like I said, I haven't created it yet. It will be ready in September.

If you've already purchased Transforming Your Self, you won't have to pay full price. Email me for a special discount.

Take Care,
Damon Cart
NLP Coach and Trainer

NLP Gym P.S. If you know a friend who would benefit from this please pass it on! No such thing as failure, only feedback. Your feedback is welcome. Reply to this email, message me on Facebook, or comment on Youtube. NLP-Gym.com

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I created NLP Gym to help others learn NLP quickly and as effectively as possible, which is to treat it the same way you would if you were building strength in a gym.

My mission is to make NLP accessible to as many people as possible especially those who desire to learn it. My vision is of a world where NLP is as commonly practiced as yoga or martial arts because our bodies are not the only parts of us that need exercise and nourishing.

Stick around. It's going to keep getting better!